


a part of me is missing, when you're not here

by spacemanearthgirl



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Getting Together, Lots of cute phone calls, Pining, SuperCorp, They miss each other a lot because they're in love, mentions of Sanvers, supergirl reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-07-20 15:34:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16140230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacemanearthgirl/pseuds/spacemanearthgirl
Summary: Based on an anon prompt from tumblr:"If it inspires you, could you write a fic with Lena having to move away for a while to run the business and they are all mopey and sad and even more clingy because they’re not going to be in the same city anymore and after a couple of insufferable weeks Kara caves in and risks it all by telling her best friend that she’s Supergirl just so she can fly over whenever? I just love the combo reveal + friends to lovers and you do it so forking well."





	a part of me is missing, when you're not here

**Author's Note:**

> They're still in the same timezone, because I didn't want to deal with time differences.

Kara tilts her face into the neck of the hoodie she’s wearing, burrowing deeper into the warm feeling as she presses herself further into the couch. She’s worn the shirt enough over the last nine days that it only smells vaguely like Lena now, but it’s enough that it still sets off the warm feeling in her chest.

She glances down at the phone clutched in her hand, willing it to burst to life. She knows that with her speed and hearing, she could reach it in less than a second when it rings, but she’s not taking any chances in missing this phone call.

She hasn’t heard Lena’s voice in _four days_ , she hasn’t seen her in person in even longer. It’s been nine days since she’s gotten to hug her, and that’s far too long in her book.

Kara clicks on the phone screen, wants to make sure it’s actually on, and she’s met with Lena’s face. Two days ago, Lena had sent her a selfie, one from her temporary office building, the city in the background unfamiliar. But the face smiling back at her isn’t, it’s one she’d memorised long ago.

She’d immediately set it as her new background and now every time she uses her phone, she’s met with Lena’s face and it fills her with warmth, and longing.

_She really can’t wait until Lena is home._

Lena had said two weeks, that’s only five more days, five more days until she can hug her best friend again.

Kara’s phone lights up in her hand, a different photo of Lena appearing on the screen.

(This one is of Lena pouting, Kara had stolen Lena’s ice cream and the face that Lena had pulled had been too adorable not to capture. It had taken some convincing but eventually Lena had let her use the photo as her contact in her phone).

Kara smiles as she hits the green little phone, butterflies filling her stomach. It really has been too long since she’s heard Lena’s voice.

“Hi?”

“Hello.” Lena’s smooth voice fills her ears. She can hear the smile in it and Kara finds herself relaxing into the couch even further.

“How are you?” Kara asks. They’ve texted a few times since they’d last spoken, but not as much as usual. Kara’s aware of how busy Lena has been, evident by the fact that this is only the second time they’ve been able to speak since she’s been away.

They did have a third call planned, but a Supergirl emergency got in the way of that.

“Tired,” Lena sighs and the urge to fly across the country just to give her a hug hits her strong and fast. It’s not the first time she’s thought about just flying over to her see her, but one thing, one _secret_ , is stopping her. “It’s been pretty busy here.” Lena continues, thankfully distracting her from the thought that she’s still lying to her best friend.

Lena pauses then and Kara just sits in the silence, listens instead to Lena’s strong heartbeat through the phone, lets it soothe her. It’s been a long nine days not being able to hear that across the city too. “I miss you.”

Kara smiles, lets the words fill her. “I miss you too. Are you looking after yourself?”

Kara can hear the smile is back. “I am, Jess is making sure I’m well fed and that I don’t stay at work later than midnight.”

Kara’s glad she has Jess with her, that someone is there to look out for her (and maybe a little bit jealous that Jess got to go with her).

“What did you have for dinner tonight?”

Lena laughs, the sound wrapping around her heart. “It’s always about food with you, isn’t it?”

Kara feels her cheeks heat up and she’s glad that Lena can’t see her. But that passes after a moment and suddenly she wishes Lena were here again, even if she did smirk, or tease her.

Having Lena here right now would be worth anything.

“I had pizza,” Kara supplies, smiling even wider. “If that helps.”

“I’m not even surprised,” Lena laughs. “I had a salad.”

Kara pulls a face. “That’s too healthy.”

“I’m having a glass of wine and some ice cream now, is that better?”

“Mint choc chip?”

“Of course.”

Rao, Kara has missed this, this easy back and forth between them, this comfort.

_It’s not normal to miss your best friend this much, is it?_

Kara buries her face further into the hoodie she stole, tucks her legs up under her to get even more comfortable.

And then she can’t help but ask, words that she’s been thinking since Lena left, and every single day since. She’d told herself she wouldn’t ask though, doesn’t want to pressure Lena, knowing what her work means to her.

But she also just really misses her and can’t wait to see her again, and that’s what makes her voice her next question.

“Will you be coming home soon?”

“I didn’t realise how much I thought of National City as home until I left,” Lena says and the words surprise Kara, she’d almost forgotten there was a time that Lena wasn’t here, wasn’t in her life.

It’s a time she doesn’t want to think about, her life has gotten so much better since Lena arrived in it. She feels less alone now, and of course she’s always had Alex, has Maggie now too, and her other friends, and Eliza, but Lena is different. Lena brought something new to her life, something she can’t imagine herself without now, doesn’t want to.

Lena sighs. “I’m going to be away a bit longer than the two weeks I originally planned.”

Kara had almost forgotten her original question, to busy thinking about how Lena has begun to feel like home, when her stomach sinks as her words register.

“How much longer?”

“Another two, maybe three, weeks?”

“Oh.”

Kara can hear the sadness in her own voice, knows Lena must hear it too, even through just the one word.

“I’m sorry, I know I promised it wouldn’t be long-“

Kara cuts her off, can hear the guilt in her voice and she doesn’t want to be the cause of that.

“It’s fine, I know how busy you are, how important the work you’re doing is.” She pauses before she continues. “I just miss my games night partner. I had to team up with Winn and James for charades the other night and it did not go well.”

Lena laughs and it makes her feel a bit better. “I’ll just have to make sure I’m back for next games night then, we can’t have you losing twice in a row.”

Before Kara can respond, Lena is talking again.

“Shoot, I’m sorry, I’m going to have to cut our conversation short, I’m getting another call.”

Kara’s heart sinks, she’d hoped they’d have longer to talk. Lena’s use of the word “shoot” helps though, something she knows Lena picked up from her.

“Don’t work too hard, okay?”

Lena laughs. “I promise nothing. Actually, I promise I’ll call you soon, okay? I’ve missed talking to you.”

Lena’s voice is so soft and Kara aches for it, aches for Lena, aches to pull her close and never let go.

“Me too. Goodnight, Lena.”

“Goodnight.”

The line goes dead after a moment and Kara sighs as she drops her phone into her lap. Maybe one day she’ll work up the courage to tell Lena the truth. If she had already, she could just fly across the country to visit her. Until then, she’s stuck alone, in her apartment, missing her best friend more than she knows she should.

xxx

Kara glances again down at the phone in her hand, hoping any moment that it’ll ring. Lena had promised she’d call her soon and it’s been 24 hours since their last call. How long did Lena mean when she’d said soon?

“You know staring at it isn’t going to make it ring?”

“I know,” Kara sighs and after a long look at her phone, she tucks it into her pocket. She’s here for a movie night and she’s going to enjoy the time with her sister and Maggie, even if in her heart she knows that someone is missing.

Usually she’d have Lena pressed warm into her side as they watched a movie and if she’s lucky, Lena would drop her head to rest on her shoulder as the night goes on.

Now her side is cold, but Alex on the other side does make her feel a _bit_ better.

It’s like Maggie has somehow read her mind as she stands up, only to sit down on the other side of the couch, so now Kara is sandwiched between the two.

“You know she’ll be back soon right?” Maggie says. “It’s only a few more weeks.”

_A few weeks too long._

“I know,” Kara sighs again. “I just miss her.”

“Really? I never would have guessed,” Alex says playfully, gently bumping her side. “Stop moping.”

“You’re one to talk. You moped around for two weeks while Maggie was away a few months ago.”

Alex isn’t quick with a comeback so Kara turns to look at her, only to find Alex giving her an amused look, eyebrow raised.

“What?”

“You do realise the difference between the two situations is that I was missing my _wife.”_

“Best friends are important too,” Kara says, indignant. Aside from Alex, Lena is the most important person too her.

Actually, no. She loves Lena, and it may be different to how she loves Alex, but she is just as important to her.

So, best friends are important too, the only difference is that she doesn’t have a piece of paper to show how much Lena means to her.

Alex’s tone turns gentle. “I know, and I know how much she means to you. I’m surprised you haven’t flown over to seen her yet.”

“I think Lena would be rather surprised if I just turned up on her doorstep.”

“Why?” Maggie asks. “I’m sure she’d be happy to see you too.”

“Well, for one, she’ll wonder how I got there.”

“Wait,” Alex cuts in. “She doesn’t know?”

Kara frowns. “That I’m Supergirl? No.”

This time she seems to have stunned Maggie and Alex into silence.

“What?”

“Your really haven’t told her?”

She looks back and forth between them, they both seem genuinely surprised by the news. Of course she hasn’t told Lena, if she had, Alex would know. She’s thought about it, with increasing frequency, but she hasn’t told Lena.

_Yet._

“No…I… do you think I should?”

“I’m honestly surprised you haven’t,” Alex says. “She’s your best friend, I just assumed you’d told her but hadn’t told me yet.”

Kara feels more guilt pool in her stomach. Lena _is_ her best friend, and yet she hasn’t told her the biggest thing about her. She’s spent the entirety of their friendship lying to Lena about this huge thing, and Lena has no idea.

“It’s okay that you haven’t told her,” Alex says leaning into Kara’s side more. “You don’t have to, not until you’re ready.”

“Do you think she’ll forgive me?”

Because if Lena doesn’t, Kara thinks it might break her.

Kara doesn’t miss the look shared between Maggie and Alex, but she’s too scared to ask what it means.

“She may need some time but I think she will.”

Kara spends the rest of the night settled comfortably between Alex and Maggie, but her mind is elsewhere. She’d had all these reasons not to tell Lena that ranged from protecting Lena, from protecting her family, being worried that Lena would hate her for what her own family has done to Lena’s. To the more selfish, not wanting to lose Lena with the truth.

But it is selfish to keep something this thing big from her, from her best friend, and she knows she can’t do it for much longer so no matter what, Lena deserves the truth, and Kara will give it to her, even if it changes everything.

xxx

Kara’s mid-mouthful, cheeks bulging, at lunch the next day when Lena’s face lights up her phone screen. She actually drops her sandwich, some of the fillings spilling out in her haste to answer the phone.

“Hullo,” Kara says, the word mostly muffled by her still full mouthful and she hastily swallows her food so she can talk properly. “Sorry, hi.”

“Hi,” Lena laughs, and Kara’s chest fills with warmth even if she is rather embarrassed at how she answered the phone. “I take it you’re in the middle of lunch?”

“Maybe,” Kara says and Lena laughs again. “Is everything okay? You don’t usually call during the day.”

“Everything’s fine. I just promised my best friend I’d call her soon, and I thought I’d actually take a lunch break today so I could do just that. Can you talk now?”

Even if she was busy, Kara would rearrange her schedule just to talk to Lena. “Now’s perfect, I’m just having my lunch too.”

“Well then, it’s almost like we’re having lunch together.”

“Almost,” Kara sighs and she doesn’t mean for it to sound so wistful, but it does.

Talking to Lena is great, and it’s certainly a nice surprise, but it’s not the same as having her here, it’s not the same as them having lunch _together_.

She can’t see Lena’s smile as she delicately eats her food, can’t be embarrassed herself when she does the opposite, and Lena has to point out some food she has stuck on her face.

There’s no seeing the green of Lena’s eyes as she recounts her day, the way her hands travel as she explains something, or the warm press of a hug at the end of their lunch.

She still loves talking to her, but it’s not the same on the phone as it is in person.

She just misses her best friend, and can’t wait for her to come home.

But she’s not going to say that, not again, doesn’t want to pressure Lena or make her feel bad about being away. She just hopes Lena didn’t catch her wistful tone a moment ago.

“Hold on,” Lena says and Kara’s heart stills. Lena’s a busy woman, and she won’t be surprised if their call is about to get cut short by a business emergency.

She is surprised though, when her phone makes a noise, and she pulls it away from her ear to see that Lena’s requesting to video call her.

Any disappointment she’d felt before instantly vanishes and she’s already grinning as she hits the accept button. Lena’s face lights up the screen again, but this time it’s a real time shot of her.

_Rao, Kara has missed that face._

And she’s wearing glasses??

“Hi,” Kara grins, a grin Alex would refer to as “uncontrollable” at this point.

“Hey,” Lena smiles.  “I thought this might make it feel more like we’re actually together.”

“It does,” Kara says as she situates her phone on the desk so she can still see Lena, while Lena can see her, as Lena does the same. “So, I have a question.”

Lena laughs. “Is it about the glasses?”

“It is. You don’t usually wear them at work?”

What she means by that is, she’s never seen Lena in those glasses paired with a work outfit, because right now she looks _hot._

Kara has only ever seen Lena wear her glasses twice, once when she’d turned up to movie night in them, and once when Kara had stopped by to see if Lena was okay after there’d been another attack on her life.

The first time she’d seen her, she’d almost had a heart attack. Lena had looked utterly adorable in her pyjamas, hair in a messy bun and black frames perched on her nose. She’d known for a while that she had feelings for her best friend, but that was the first time she’d realised she was in love with her.

The second time she’d seen her, the heart attack had come earlier in the day, when Kara had only just made it in time to save her. She’d almost told her that night, that she’s Supergirl, as they’d been curled up on Lena’s couch together, after Lena had admitted she didn’t want to be alone. But she’d kept her secret then, didn’t want to put something else big on Lena when she’d already been through so much.

And now as she looks at her, she’s reminded of both those times, reminded that she’s in love with the woman in front of her, but she’s also keeping a huge secret from her best friend, something she’s now realising she should’ve told her a long time ago.

“My eyes were getting sore from the contacts so I decided to wear my glasses instead since I have no face to face meetings today.”

Right now though she pushes that from her mind and focuses on the adorable woman in front of her. This isn’t something she wants to tell her over the phone, so for now, she’s just going to enjoy their call.

“But you’d wear them in front of me?” Kara puts her hand to her chest as she tilts her head to the side. “I’m honoured.”

Lena laughs again and Kara feels warm all over.

“So, tell me about your day.”

And Lena does, and Kara listens as she continues to eat her mostly intact sandwich. And then Kara tells Lena about her day, glad nothing ‘ _Super_ ’ has happened so she doesn’t have to lie.

By the time Jess appears to tell Lena that she has a conference call, it’s been over an hour and Kara’s not sure how they got onto the topic of college but it has felt good to just hang out and talk to Lena.

She’s glad Snapper hasn’t come looking for her, because she’s definitely not meant to still be on her lunch break.

Kara picks up her phone, and Lena does the same, as her face fills the screen once more.

Glasses are _definitely_ a good look on her.

“I’ll talk to you soon?” Lena says, the words sounding too much like a question. There’s no question about it, they’ll talk again soon.

“Soon,” Kara promises with a smile.

“Goodbye, Kara,” Lena says, waving her fingers at the camera and Kara can’t help but grin at how adorable it is.

“Bye.”

Kara’s in a good mood for the rest of the day.

xxx

The noise is too loud as Kara’s hand stumbles over her nightstand, looking it’s source. She realises it’s coming from beside her bed and she has to lean over the edge precariously to retrieve her phone from under a shirt.

“Hello,” she answers, not even glancing at the screen as she’s hit what she hopes was the answer button.

A soft laugh filters through the speaker and Kara immediately feels herself settle into the sound. She’d recognise that laugh anywhere.

“Lena?”

“Good night, I presume?”

She’d had a very good night, she’s not having a very good morning though.

Or she wasn’t until Lena called.

“Mmhmm,” Kara hums as she rolls over, to the side of her bed that the sunlight is touching. She relaxes in the warm rays, instantly feeling better.

Lena laughs again. “You must’ve had a very good night, considering it’s almost lunch time.”

Kara groans again. At least it’s Saturday. And the pounding in her head has already lessened considerably, the sunlight working wonders on her alien cells. She doesn’t know how humans can handle hangovers, they’re not fun, even if hers don’t last long once she’s in the sun.

She can’t imagine how Maggie and Alex must be feeling right now. They’d all gone out, Winn and James included, for celebratory drinks for Maggie’s birthday. Cleary they’d all done _too much_ celebrating last night.

“Did you call just to tease me?”

“No, I called to make sure you had fun last night, and to see if you remembered calling me.”

Kara sits straight up in bed. “I what?”

“You called me. The call didn’t wake me but _luckily_ you left a voicemail.”

Kara groans again but this time it has nothing to do with the alcohol. “Oh no.”

She can hear the grin in Lena’s voice. “Oh yes.”

She can’t even begin to imagine what she may have said, she doesn’t even remember trying to call her. She’d missed Lena last night, her not being there for another group event, but she doesn’t recall calling her at all.

Kara’s not sure if she wants to ask the next question. “What did I say?”

“ _So much_.”

“Lena,” Kara whines, wanting to be put out of her misery. At least Lena doesn’t sound mad, she mostly just sounds amused.

“I didn’t know a drunk Kara Danvers could ramble so much. I’ve already saved the message so it can make me feel better if I ever have a bad day.”

She wants to say that Lena can just call her if she ever has a bad day, but right now she’s more focused on exactly _what_ she said during this drunken ramble.

“Are you done having fun teasing me yet?” Kara pouts.

“You know pouting doesn’t work when I’m not there to see it?”

Her lips sticks out even more.

“God I can almost hear the pout,” Lena laughs. “How do you do that?”

“Was the message really so bad that you won’t tell me what I said?” She’s actually starting to get nervous now.

“It wasn’t bad at all. In fact, it was kind of cute.”

At this point, groaning is almost second nature. “Do I even want to know what I said?”

“There was surprisingly little slurring considering how much I’m guessing you drank.” Lena begins. “You started off by telling me how much you love alcohol, and just from that I knew it was going to be a good message.”

Oh no.

“You told me you couldn’t wait until I was home, and that you were going to give me a hug for at least an hour the next time you saw me.”

Yep, that sounds like something she’d say. But to be fair, she’d probably say that sober too.

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Lena continues and Kara wishes she could have that hug now. “You said I should wear glasses more too, any idea why you’d say that?”

“Ahhh…” Kara freezes, because she knows exactly why she’d say that, Lena had looked damn good the last time she’d seen her, and she’d looked adorable the times before. She’s just hoping she said neither of those things over the phone.

“Is it because I look adorable in them?”

 _Oh Rao._ At least she didn’t say Lena looked hot wearing them.

Kara’s cheeks heat up as she buries her face into her pillows in embarrassment.  “I…uhhh…maybe?” Her voice comes out half muffled.

Lena’s laughter comes soft through the phone and even in her embarrassment, it makes her feel light.

Kara clears her throat, turns so she can speak more clearly. “Did I say anything else?”

Lena’s laugh again makes her regret asking.

Kara’s cheeks heat up as she buries her face into her pillows once more.

“You may have mentioned stealing one of my hoodies before I left, which I totally saw you do while you were helping me pack.”

“You knew about that??” She thought she’d been careful, hiding it in her bag when Lena had been looking the other way.

“You’re not that sneaky, Kara Danvers.”

_If only Lena knew._

“You can have it back when you’re back home.”

“Keep it,” Lena says. “That way you can’t get mad when you realise I stole that blanket that sits on your couch.”

“That’s where it went!” She’d been wondering where that had gone, it’s always Lena’s preferred blanket on movie nights, but she hasn’t seen it in a while. In fact, come to think of it, she hasn’t seen it since Lena left. But when had she stolen it? Kara hadn’t noticed a thing.

“Yes, because I _can_ be sneaky.”

Kara can almost see the wink that would follow that sentence. She laughs. “You could’ve just asked.”

“And where’s the fun in that?”

A knock at the door draws Kara’s attention from Lena and she groans yet again.

“What?”

“Someone’s at the door, and I can’t be bothered getting out of bed to see who it is.” It’s a man she doesn’t recognise, her x-ray vision tells her that much, but she’s much too warm in the sun to get up to see what the man wants. Her hangover is long gone now, but the sun is still nice.

“I would if I were you. That’s why I called, I wanted to make sure you were awake when my surprise arrived.”

Kara sits straight up in bed again. “Surprise?”

“I couldn’t be there myself to bring you food, so I did the next best thing.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did. Noonan’s is apparently quite happy to deliver when it comes to their favourite customer and you offer them a decent amount of money.”

“ _Lena._ ” Kara’s heart swells. “You shouldn’t have.”

“I know, but I wanted too.”

There’s another knock at the door and Kara almost falls out of bed in her haste to get out as she gets tangled in the sheets. Lena must hear the commotion because she laughs.

“You’re the best!” Kara says, already halfway across her apartment. “If you were here I’d hug you.”

“For an hour?” Lena jokes and Kara’s cheeks heat up. “I’ll let you get your food, I’m sure you’re hungry. Talk to you soon?”

“Of course. And Lena?”

Lena hums.

“Thank you.”

“Always.”

The phone line goes dead and Kara greets one of the servers from Noonan’s with a smile, who’s holding mountain of food.

Kara sends Lena a selfie with all the food, cheeks already bulging from her second sticky bun. She receives a picture in return, one of Lena, wrapped in her blanket, glasses on her face.

It’s definitely worth how bad she felt this morning if this is what she gets in return.

xxx

It had been Lena’s idea, a rather cute idea actually, to watch the same thing on TV together whilst being on the phone. There was no way that Kara was going to say no to a request like that.

She sees the joke on screen, just as Lena’s laugh comes through the phone, and it’s almost as good as Lena being here.

Except it’s not as good because Lena’s not _actually here_.

But anyway, that’s not the point, the point is Lena’s cute and it’s great hearing her laugh so often.

They’re four episodes into Brooklyn Nine-Nine now and Kara’s just heard Lena yawn for the third time, so, she thinks it’s about time for them to call it a night.

“I’m awake!” Lena protests when Kara says just that, but the yawn at the end of her sentence tells Kara she’s definitely not.

Kara laughs. “Barely.”

“Fine,” Lena says and Kara hears the TV switch off in the background so she does the same. “I’ll go to bed.”

“Good.”

Kara listens to Lena as she moves through her hotel room and gets ready for bed, Kara talking softly as she does.

She can tell Lena’s in bed when she next speaks.

“Thank you for tonight,” she says, sounding sleepier than before. Her voice is so soft and Kara wishes she was there, that she could see the sleepy expression that matches that tone. “I had fun.”

“Me too.”

“Almost like having a movie night together,” Lena says, mirroring Kara’s earlier thoughts. “Except a normal movie night with you has a lot more cuddling.”

Kara’s suddenly breathless as she laughs, she hadn’t expected Lena to say that.

“Don’t laugh,” Lena pouts, a heavy sigh at the end of her sentence. “I love movie night cuddles. Your blanket is warm and smells like you, but it’s not the same as the real thing.”

And now Kara really can’t breathe. Lena must be close to sleep, Kara knows she’d never say something like that if she was thinking clearly.

“Lena?”

“Mmmmm?”

“Can I come over?” The words are out of Kara’s mouth before she can fully process them.

“I’d like that,” Lena breathes. “I miss you.”

“Now?”

Kara’s not entirely sure what she’s doing but she knows she wants to see Lena, knows Lena wants to see her too, and if she has to tell Lena her secret for that to happen, then she will.

She’s meet with silence and Kara immediately panics, wonders if she’s pushed too much.

“Lena?”

Still, nothing, so Kara focuses on Lena, hears her steady heartbeat and even breathing through the phone, and suddenly it makes sense why Lena’s not responding.

She’s asleep.

Kara just listens for a moment, let’s Lena’s breathing and heartbeat wash over her, lets it soothe her until her own heart matches the pace.

She hadn’t really been thinking when she’d impulsively asked if she could visit, it wouldn’t be fair to spring something so big on Lena while she’d half asleep.

But that doesn’t mean she won’t tell her, and soon. But she needs some help first.

As soon as she hangs up the phone, she messages Alex.

**Can I ask you a question?**

She’s relieved that the reply is almost instant.

**Of course. What’s up?**

**What would you think if a friend said they miss you, they love your cuddles, and that being wrapped in your blanket is nice because it’s warm and smells like you, but isn’t as good as the real thing?**

The message sounds wordy, and she hits send before she can overthink it. She’s not sure how else to ask anyway.

**That’s gay.**

Of course that’s Alex’s response.

**I’m being serious.**

**So am I. Did Lena say that? Because if so, she’s definitely into you.**

That’s the answer Kara had been expecting, and if anyone else had said those things to her, she would’ve immediately jumped to the same conclusion. But this is _Lena_ , there’s no way Lena has feelings for her, right? That just doesn’t make sense. Lena could have absolutely anyone. Why would she want her?

But it seems like she might, according to Alex anyway. But who says Alex is the best judge of romantic feelings, it took her this long to figure out she was into girls?

A second message comes through which blows that idea out of the water.

**Maggie agrees with me. Lena definitely has feelings for you.**

_How is that even possible?_

**Ok, thanks** , she sends back instead, not sure what else to say, and now with a whole other set of things on her mind.

She needs to tell Lena the truth. Kara owes her that much. All she’s done is lie to her since they met and Lena has done nothing but trust her. It doesn’t seem fair that she’s kept it from her all this time, for all these reasons that don’t even seem to matter that much anymore.

If she’d already told Lena the truth, she could’ve flown across the country tonight to see her, could’ve been there in person to hug her instead of Lena saying she missed her.

The feelings thing, on both sides, doesn’t matter right now. All she needs to do is tell her best friend the truth. Whatever happens afterwards, that’s up to Lena.

xxx

“Can I come and visit?”

She doesn’t mean for that to be the first thing she says when Lena calls her the next evening, but she’s been thinking about this moment all day so she just blurts it out. She wants to tell Lena the truth now, but she wants to do it in person.

The idea has become so stuck in her head, she just wants Lena to know the truth, wants Lena to see all of her, not just the parts she’s let her see so far.

She’d already asked Lena the same question last night, but she’s fairly certain she doesn’t remember the end of their conversation, not in her tired state.

“Of course,” Lena says with a laugh, and Kara is already out the window before she finishes her sentence. “I can organise a plane for you this weekend, if you’d like?”

“Thanks but...I was thinking now?”

Lena laughs again. “It’s 9 o’clock at night, even if you could get a flight now, you wouldn’t get here until after midnight.”

“I was just…” she trails off. She doesn’t want to say the words over the phone, wants to do it face to face. Lena deserves that much. As she gets closer, she picks up Lena’s heartbeat and follows it, lets the sound soothe her once again as she flies closer.

“Exactly. I can get Jess to set up a flight for Friday evening, then you can stay the weekend?”

Kara lands gently on her balcony and takes a deep breath. “Or you could just open your balcony door?”

“What?”

Kara can almost hear Lena’s confusion as she makes her way across the hotel room. She sees the curtain rustle and for a moment Kara thinks about just jumping over the edge of the balcony and flying off, pretending that it was just a joke.

Because if tonight goes wrong, if Lena doesn’t like what she has to say, she could lose her best friend.

But she pushes passed that fear. She doesn’t deserve to call Lena her best friend until she’s told her her secret.

Lena’s heart leaps as she looks through the window, and Kara’s does that same.

_Rao, she’s missed that face._

Kara hangs up the phone, tucks it away, as Lena opens the door.

“Kara...what are you…how?” Lena looks behind her like the answer to how she got here is there, but of course she sees nothing.

“I have to tell you something.”

Lena lets out a huff of breath. “And you couldn’t just tell me over the phone.”

“Not this,” she says, shaking her head.

“Come in,” Lena says, taking a step back to usher her inside.

(There goes leaping off the balcony to reveal her secret, but that seems too mean anyway, she’s not looking to give Lena a heart attack).

“Is everything okay? You’re scaring me,” Lena says, looking nervous. And that’s not what Kara wants, she’s not doing this to upset Lena, she’s doing it because she’s hid herself from Lena for way too long.

So she just says it.

“I’m Supergirl.”

Lena’s mouth drops open, eyes roaming over Kara like she’s trying to figure out if she’s telling the truth.

So Kara hovers a few feet off the ground, just so there’ll be no doubt in Lena’s mind.

(Another option would’ve been to reveal her suit, but she’s not wearing it right now. She really didn’t think this through that well).

“You’re Supergirl?”

Kara swallows and nods.

“Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because I miss you, and you miss me, and it seemed silly that we were apart when we could be together.”

That’s not what she meant to say, but it’s part of the truth.

The laughter from Lena is unexpected. “You’re telling me the truth now because you wanted to see me?”

“I...yes? But also no. I...shoot, I really should’ve planned this better.”

If the laughter was unexpected, she certainly doesn’t expect it when Lena steps forward and engulfs her in a hug.

Kara’s arms immediately wrap around Lena as the smaller woman practically melts into the embrace. Kara feels the tension leave her, like Lena’s warm body is sucking it away, and all she’s left with is a warm feeling in her chest.

Lena hasn’t run, she hasn’t yelled, she’s still here, so things might just be okay.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Lena says, the words quiet between then and Kara just tightens her hold.

Everything around her is Lena, to the soft pressure of their bodies together, to the heartbeat that’s filling her ears, to the scent of her perfume that she’s missed so much.

_It’s wonderful._

“Is this the one hour hug you promised when you next saw me?” Lena jokes as she pulls away, but she stays close, as green eyes meet hers.

“It’s been nowhere near an hour,” Kara laughs, but she could definitely stand here holding Lena longer.

She could do that forever.

But she needs to do some more explaining, can’t just leave it at what’s already been said. It’s not fair to Lena, she deserves to know everything.

“I was so scared to tell you the truth,” Kara begins. “That’s why it took me so long. I should’ve told you I was Supergirl long ago.”

Lena tilts her head in question. “Why didn’t you?”

“Because it’s always been a secret, one that puts people in danger if they know. And I didn’t want to do that to you, didn’t want to put you in more danger than you already were. But that’s a poor excuse for why I didn’t, just being close to me put you in danger and it was selfish of me to not give you the choice to leave, if you didn’t think our friendship was worth the risk.”

A warm hand grips hers, tight. “I’d choose you over anything, always.”

“Maybe that’s what I was afraid of. I knew you’d choose me no matter how much danger it’d put yourself in.”

Warm eyes are so close to hers and Kara finds herself getting lost in Lena’s gaze for a moment.

“I was also scared about how you’d react,” Kara continues, and it feels good to finally say all of this out loud. “My family destroyed yours, both our families have hurt each other, and I didn’t want that to affect how you thought of me. I like that you see me as just Kara, and I didn’t want our family’s history to change that.”

Lena shakes her head. “How many times have you told me that the actions of my brother don’t define me? That they were his choice and not mine? How can you say that I’m my own person without believing you’re one yourself? Our families did that, not us. We’re not them, and what they did has nothing to do with us.”

“I know.” Kara drops her head. All her reasons are starting to sound even flimsier than she thought. “You’re right, I should’ve just told you sooner. But I didn’t want to lose you by telling you the truth. And then the longer I waited, the more I worried that I’d lose you for lying to you for too long. I was selfish, and I’m sorry. You have to know though, that it was never a question of trust. I do trust you, and I hope you know that.”

“It’s okay, I know, and I forgive you for not telling me until now.”

Kara’s head shoots up.

“And this doesn’t change anything between us.”

“How can you...” Kara stutters. “How can you not be angrier, more upset, that I lied to you?”

“Do you want me to be?”

Kara huffs out a breath. “Of course not. But aren’t you at least a bit upset that I’ve lied to you? Been lying to you all this time?”

Lena nods. “I am.”

“But then-”

Lena cuts her off. “I know how big something like this must be for you. You can’t just go around telling your secret to anyone-”

“But you’re not just anyone-”

Lena gives her a small smile as she cuts her off again. “I know, but I still know how hard it must’ve been for you to tell me. There’s more than just your safety at stake with this secret. I know you trust me, and that’s all that matters.”

“But how do you _know_ I trust you, when I’ve lied to you for so long?” Kara’s not sure why she’s arguing so much about this, but she wants to prove to Lena how important she is to her. Wants her to know that without a doubt, this is about her own fear and selfishness, not about her mistrust of Lena.

“Do you remember that night about six months ago? You turned up on my doorstep upset and you wouldn’t tell me what had happened, even if I suspected the truth. But you just cried and I held you until you left the next morning. That night I knew you trusted me enough to be your most vulnerable. So, that’s how I know for sure that you really do trust me.”

Kara remembers that day, she’d lost a civilian and she’d blamed herself. Lena had made her feel like she wasn’t going to fall to pieces. Lena had held her together that night.

Then something clicks in Kara’s mind.

“Wait, you suspected?”

“I’d seen the news, I saw what happened. I may not have known for sure until right now, but I’ve always suspected you may be Supergirl.”

Kara’s mouth drops open. “What! How?”

“Like I said the other day,” Lena says with a smirk. “You’re not very sneaky.”

Kara’s about to protest but Lena’s raised eyebrow stops her and she deflates. “You mean all this time I could’ve just told you the truth? Instead of worrying and feeling guilty for not?”

“You-”

Kara cuts her off with a gasp. “And I could’ve visited you while you’ve been here too! Oh, Rao, I’ve missed you so much! This whole month we’ve been apart when we could’ve been together! I could’ve flown over and visited you whenever I wanted!” She drops her head. “I’ve been so stupid.”

Lena laughs. “You have been.”

Kara looks up. “You could’ve said something.

Lena shakes her head. “It wasn’t my place.”

“Well, I’m glad I said something then.” Kara squeezes their still joined fingers, the contact warming her.

And then with the last bit of courage Kara has in her, and with the adrenaline from the last thirty minutes still coursing through her body, she just decides to stop being stupid about the other big secret in her life.

“Do you want to have dinner with me tomorrow night?”

She hears the hitch in Lena’s breath, and she knows she got the intended meaning.

Lena nods. “Yes. But on one condition.”

Kara will give her anything, and she tells Lena just that.

Lena smiles and Kara’s heart feels like it could burst out of her chest. “Tell me more about yourself?”

“I’ll tell you anything you want to know.”

And so Kara does. Lena has a million questions and Kara answers all of them as they sit curled up on the couch together, hands tangled, Kara’s blanket draped over their shoulders.

By the time morning comes, they’ve had no sleep, too busy talking to even notice. But unfortunately it’s time for her to leave as she has work soon, and so does Lena.

They step out onto the balcony together, the sun already peeking over the horizon.

Lena’s arms open and Kara easily steps into them, pressing her body against Lena’s like they haven’t been cuddled together all night. Even though she knows she’s going to see her soon, she misses Lena’s warmth as soon as they part.

“Are we still on for tonight? Or would you rather postpone so you can sleep?” She does feel slightly guilty for keeping Lena up all night, but Lena always said she was fine when Kara suggested they should sleep.

So Kara had kept talking about Krypton, something she doesn’t get to do with any people.

It felt good to finally tell Lena everything.

“How about we have dinner here? Just something low-key? I want to see you again.”

Kara smiles. “That sounds perfect.”

She steps away, ready to take off, but Lena grabs her hand, tugs her back.

“Wait. You didn’t say goodbye properly,” Lena says, stepping closer.

Kara can only watch, heart picking up speed as Lena leans closer. As she tilts her head, Kara remains perfectly still, afraid that one small move will scare Lena away.

Lena presses a warm kiss to the corner of her mouth, and Kara’s breath catches. The contact is brief, and it wasn’t even a proper kiss, but it’s already the best of Kara’s life.

“I’ll see you later?”

Kara clears her throat. “I can’t wait.”

She’s up in the air before she can do something stupid like kiss her back, this time on the mouth.

_(She thinks kissing Lena wouldn’t be a stupid idea at all)._

Kara can’t stop smiling the whole way home.

\---

Lena has to spend another month away after that, but the distance is suddenly nothing when Kara can fly over any time she likes to see her girlfriend.

Which she does.

Often.

And she’s always greeted with a warm smile, a hug, a kiss, and a feeling in her chest that she knows is home.

**Author's Note:**

> I'd really love to hear your thoughts, I enjoyed writing this one.
> 
> Tumblr: spaceman-earthgirl


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